A lot of People ask us a lot of crazy questions about ourselves all the time and much of the time they have been asked 6 or 7 times previously that very day. To save ourselves a bunch of time we could be spending making love to some lovely ladies we have prepared this list of often asked questions along with the appropriate answer.
Q: What does F.O.I. stand for?
A: F.O.I. stands for “Flip Out Intensity” and is intrinsic to the way of the ninja. It is a way of measuring the strength, speed and agility of a ninja and is invaluable when it comes to bragging rights and in procuring intercourse with attractive women.
Q: How is your F.O.I. calculated?
A: Generally it is calculated buy documenting a ninja destroying something like a car, warehouse, tank etc. The sturdiness of the item being destroyed plays a vital part in determining a ninjaz F.O.I. For example, a car destroyed in 2.5 seconds would render a lower F.O.I. than a tank destroyed in 3.5 seconds. An interesting fact is that for Shinoko to improve on his F.O.I. at this point he would need to destroy a planet which he and the rest of NWA have agreed would be unethical. However the B.O.N.E.R.S. (Board of ninja energy related statistics) are working on new ways of determining F.O.I. that don’t involve the destruction of planets.
Q: Why do you kill people for no reason?
A: This one is a common misconception. We don’t kill people for no reason, we just don’t need much of a reason. The world is full of dickheads, people who do many annoying things that would otherwise go unpunished like: Littering, singing popular radio songs, loitering, being annoying, cutting you off in traffic, wearing popular clothing then getting the impression that you are somehow different, telling stupid jokes and the list goes on and on. We do need to kill and it’s a way of life for us but as long as there are jerks in this world like the ones I mentioned above we’ll be alright. Heaven help us if we kill them all…
Q: Why don’t you wear masks, shouldn’t ninjaz wear masks?
A: No. Ninjaz shouldn’t wear masks. Why? Because we don’t give a shit who sees us doing what we’re doing. The media has given the world this idea that ninjaz wear masks and if I was to guess I’d say it started when people on Earth first started getting killed by ninjaz. Any witnesses left standing most likely didn’t see the ninja because they were moving too fast and when the police asked what the ninja looked like they said “Oh, I didn’t get a good look at his face” then everyone assumes that this automatically means that ninjaz wear masks. What a bunch of losers.
Q: Why do you use a “z” to pluralise ninja?
A: On planet Ninjitsu we pluralise everything with a “z” (when we are communicating with English) so when on Earth we pluralise Earthly things with an “s” and Ninja, being from planet Ninjitsu we pluralise with a “z”
Q: Can you play at my party?
A: Ok this one requires a little common sense, these are the questions you need to have an answer to these questions:
- Are you a hot female?
- Do you have many hot female friends?
- Are you willing to pay us a shitload of cash?
- Are you prepared to surrender your house and deal with the loss of any precious items destroyed during the after party?
If you can answer yes to four or more of those questions then yes, we’ll play your party.